Hadith 13: loving for your brother what you love for yourself

The hadith. Anas ibn Maalik reported that the Prophet ﷺ said: لَا يُؤْمِنُ أَحَدُكُمْ حَتَّى يُحِبَّ لِأَخِيهِ مَا يُحِبُّ لِنَفْسِهِ "None of you (truly) believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself."

Source: hadith no. 13 of An-Nawawi. Reported by Al-Bukhari (no. 13) and Muslim (no. 45).

"Does not believe": scholars explain that this means complete faith. Someone who has not yet reached it is still a Muslim, but something of faith is missing. It is a goal we move towards.

"His brother": first of all, the brother in religion. Several scholars explained that we also wish good for all human beings, and first of all that they receive guidance [À VÉRIFIER : formulation selon les commentaires].

What it changes: • No more jealousy: when a friend succeeds, we are happy for them, as we would like them to be happy for us. • Sharing: if I like having a good place, I also leave room for others. • Fairness: I do not do to others what I would not like done to me (mockery, cheating, a rumour). • Good advice: if I would like to be warned of a mistake, I warn my friend too, gently.

The opposite of this hadith is selfishness and envy. The Prophet ﷺ put generosity of the heart at the centre of faith.

And you? Think of someone whose success made you a little jealous. Can you make a sincere dua for them today, wishing them even more good?

Understanding the lesson

Explanation This hadith touches something very inward: what we feel when someone else receives something good. It does not only ask us not to do harm: it asks us to wish good, from the bottom of our heart.

We need to tell two feelings apart. Envy (hasad) is wanting the other person to lose what they have: that is what the hadith fights. Healthy emulation (ghibtah) is wishing to have a similar good, without taking anything from the other. The Prophet ﷺ said there is no permitted envy except in two cases: towards someone Allah has given wealth which he spends on good, and towards someone Allah has given wisdom which he applies and teaches (Bukhari 73, Muslim 816). This refers to that healthy emulation.

A very practical way to work on the heart: making dua for one's brother in his absence. The Prophet ﷺ said that an angel then replies: "And for you the same." (Muslim 2732). By wishing good for the other, we receive it too.

Lessons to draw from it • When a friend succeeds, I am sincerely happy for him. • I make duas for others in their absence. • I don't do to others what I would not like done to me. • I turn jealousy into motivation: I work to improve, without wishing harm on anyone.

Key points to remember • لَا يُؤْمِنُ أَحَدُكُمْ حَتَّى يُحِبَّ لِأَخِيهِ مَا يُحِبُّ لِنَفْسِهِ (Bukhari 13, Muslim 45). • Envy (hasad) wants the other to lose; healthy emulation (ghibtah) wants a similar good.

The main message Complete faith is a generous heart, one that wishes others the good it loves for itself.